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Reading Digest: Still Waiting For Renewal Edition
“You’ve been flushing for twenty minutes. Is there a problem?” – Principal Skinner “Uh, no, Principal Skinner.” – Jimbo Jones “Very well. I’ll continue to wait.” – Principal Skinner As near as...
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Quote of the Day
“I’ll send Laura over to babysit as soon as she gets home.” – Ruth Powers “Great. Oh, uh, and there was something else, something I was supposed to tip-toe around.” – Homer Simpson “My divorce.” –...
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Quote of the Day
“Hello, what’s this? Wire hangers? Expired medicine? Old newspapers! Okay, Homer, stay calm. Just quietly get this stuff inside your house. Homer! You’re not listening!” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday...
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Quote of the Day
“Now, if you’ll excuse us, this is a sacred moment between a boy and his father. Son, a woman is a lot like . . . um, a refrigerator! They’re about six feet tall, three hundred pounds . . . they . . ....
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Quote of the Day
“Homer, I’ve a proposition for ye. Fair and true.” – Captain McAllister “C’mon, Marge, let the people see your pretty face.” – Homer Simpson “Come see Bottomless Pete, Nature’s cruelest mistake! Come...
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Quote of the Day
“Sometimes I think you want to fail!” – First Guy From Kabul “Shut up. Just shut up!” – Second Guy From Kabul
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Quote of the Day
“Homer, Bart’s at a very curious age. As his father, I think you should have a frank and earthy discussion about . . . you know.” – Marge Simpson
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Quote of the Day
“But, Marge, I think he should learn about it the same way I did.” – Homer Simpson “Are you sure?” – Marge Simpson “Zookeeper! Zookeeper! Those two monkeys are killing each other!” – Homer Simpson...
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Quote of the Day
“Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! . . . But you can’t stop at one! You wanna drink another woman! . . . So I...
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Quote of the Day
“There you are! Thought you could get away?” – Homer Simpson “Goodbye.” – Prospective Simpson Neighbor
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